I have many fond memories of Halo 1, and the Elites around me yelling “Wort Wort Wort” and “Ahhhhrrr rollemup!” before pummeling me to death. Ah… good times. Good times.
Too tired or poor to buy valentines this year? Then print out valentines from my “Red vs Blue” valentine album! Over 150 quotes from the popular Halo machinima series to choose from including some of their “public service announcements” and their anime short. I’ve been making these for several years and I can guarantee you’ll always find just the right sentiment in these cards, from “I love you” to “Shut up, you ruined my life!” There’s a card for every relationship!
Elnea’s RvB Valentine Photobucket Album
Enjoy!
Linnea AKA Elnea
Here’s a song I put together for my mixed-religion family a few years ago. I decided that Halo Action Figure Theater would be the way I finally made a video for this beautiful and haunting tribute to Hanukkah and Christmas. Please enjoy. Also, enjoy Chuck Norris playing the accordion in a Santa hat. Because that so totally would happen.
Half-Jewish Christmas Song: Halo Action Figure Theater
Here’s another motivational poster for up-and-coming Artificial Intelligence units who insist on dressing like strippers:
link to full-size image
The plot line of Halo Action Figure Theater is starting to speed up as all the events begin to converge. This means more exposition, which means more reading, and let’s face it, none of us read webcomics to read webcomics. It’s to see the pretty pictures… like… of Cortana’s bright blue derrière (“derrière”, of course, being French for “caboose”). Woo hoo!
A few folks have expressed a bit of confusion about the plot so I’ve put up two synopses of the important events of the last 60 or so issues. I’ve included all of the events that I feel are most relevant.
If you really want to stroll down memory lane, you can look back at the first two plot synopses too, but to catch up on current events you really just need to look at Synopsis 3 and Synopsis 4 which will get you up to HAFT Issue #133.
In future if you want to go back to read those again, just click on the links you see to the right of this post. Happy reading… if you dare!
Dunh dunh DUNH…
In other news, many thanks to Dennis at Halo CE Chronicles for the mention and props in his webcomic. It is so cool to be referenced like that. I feel like this must be what self-actualization is like or something. Seriously, that is so cool. Thanks!
Well, look who turned up on my front doorstep yesterday…
LARGER VIEW
Yes, it is McFarlane’s long awaited Halo 3 figures. First off, let me applaud the Halo 3 packaging people. The packages are pretty, compact, easy to stack, and you can get the figures out of the package in a matter of about 90 seconds. There are only about 3 wires holding the figures down and they are easily removable without the use of specialty wire cutters or pliers. The figures come with a weapon and very tiny grenades. I haven’t removed any grenades from packaging yet because they are so tiny I am worried I might inhale them.
Yes, well, size is an issue here. As you can see from the above, the new figures are much smaller than the previous incarnations. But they are very detailed. The only figure I’ve taken out of packaging so far is a red EVA Spartan:
LARGER VIEW
Those that have handled the figures know that the Halo 1 figures are very sturdy. The plastic has a slight vinyl feel to it like the plastic an old GI Joe would have. The Halo 2 figures were made of a slightly more hard plastic, like a LEGO would be made of, and therefore a bit more brittle. I’ve had some problems with joint breakage with the Halo 2 figures because of this, but overall the figures are very tough.
The new figure plastic is much more rubbery, like a Gumby doll, and you can bend it, but it has more memory. For instance, when I tried to put the gun in its hand, I had to pry its thumb away from its fingers to get the gun to stay in place, which is fine, but then when I removed the gun the fingers and thumb didn’t touch each other anymore. I am a little leery about how much manipulation the fingers will take before quitting.
On the other hand, the detailing is terrific. Here’s the front of the little EVA figure:
LARGER VIEW OF FRONT
…and here is THE BACK. Nice.
Now we come to my real only complaint about the Halo 3 figures, which is a complaint really only about the Spartan figures (see the others below). The crotch. Yes, I hear you saying, “Linnea, why are you staring at the crotch of the dolls… I mean action figures?” Well, I really wasn’t, but I couldn’t figure out why the figures looked like they had full diapers, and I realized it was a problem with proportions.
In order to get good range of motion with the figures, which for some reason they decided should be done in less than dollhouse scale sizes, they had to make the pelvis unnaturally wide. Then, they decided not to unnaturally elongate the waist (or unnaturally shorten the ribcage), which is something you will see done in comic books all the time to give a more streamlined look to characters. So a combination of a wide pelvis and a short appearing waist makes the Spartans look a bit like Grandpa with a diaper. The overall effect is slightly comical, although I’m not sure it translates in my photos…
But, tearing our gaze away from the codpiece… oh wait, I can’t. Because the real jewels in the first series are the aliens. McFarlane’s done a beautiful job with the Jackal, Brute and Grunt. They are very carefully detailed and beautifully painted. Again, not as big as I would have liked, but the crotch areas in particular have great work. I haven’t been able to bring myself to taking them out of their packaging yet (for fear of inhaling a weapon) but you can get an idea here:
LARGER VIEW
Last, I have to give props to McFarlane for the articulation of the Spartan. I’ll update as to the other figures as I take them out to play. But the EVA was very articulated. I had a little bit of trouble with posing the way I am used to, but it may take a bit of playing to find all the best poses. He did have some trouble with the basic Kneel-and-fire pose:
LARGER VIEW
But the heads could turn ALL the way around. Finally, we can all do our Exorcist recreations at will!
LARGER VIEW
In summary, I think if you want an action figure that you will put next to your monitor and look at to enjoy, these are very beautiful and are worth the money. If you are collector they are easy to store in the packaging (but the plastic packaging easily dents, so you can’t just throw them in the closet). On the other hand, if you are thinking about buying these for your eight-year-old, be prepared that the weapons almost surely will be lost or inhaled within a matter of seconds after opening the packages. These are not really toys for little kids. These are toys for careful grown-ups.
Who enjoy a good codpiece.
Those in the know will notice I haven’t commented on the Cortana figure. I want to make sure she lights up etc before reviewing her…
EDIT: Oh, she lights up just fine (with 2 AAA batteries). So pretty!
